'And I don't really care about your stupid opinion.'. What can you hold without ever touching it? Of course I use the scripts I was trained to use, but when knocking on doors I love coming in with a wild card to shake things up. Sleep on it tonight. What were they? You know what a clean desk is a sign of? Answer No. 1. Guess what people do when their ice house falls apart? So far, I can read War and Peace in ten seconds. Thoughtful Employee Appreciation Ideas When you bought a new house, you called your fellow alumni and offered to name a room after them, if theyll help with the down payment. Dont you just love sales humour! 2. Member Reviews I cant take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him. Finally to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. The sales manager, feeling sorry for the young man, and surprised that he was so badly trained, called him in. Whether youre looking for a way to loosen up a tense situation or just want to make everyone laugh, these jokes are sure to do the trick. How could I say no to her? The young lady walked up to the old man, gave the car keys to him and said, Didnt I tell you theyd give me a discount? What kind of cat likes to go bowling? * Mort's Mortuary, you slice 'em, we ice 'em. 'What kind of salesperson are you? Salesman: Yes, I got two! I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Its only three words, but its a start. BREATHEEEEE!!!!! Click here to learn more. Hailing taxis! A new sales manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing. Did you hear about the traveling snowman? I cannot see you today! Thats fine, said the salesperson, Im selling eye glasses., At a job interview: 'Mrs. The immigration officer asks: "Occupation?" The German replies: "No, just a holiday." 3. The young man sits up and says: 'Wow! And whos got the greatest advertising campaigns?, Whos got the most attractive packages?, Okay. Buy a deck of cards. A voice answers, 'A blind salesman.' Angela has a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing and worked as a community manager with Yelp to plan events for businesses. Finally, the Stradivarius family put a sign out at their shop saying: 'We make the best violins on the block.'. Everyones eyes glaze over before youve even warmed up. We both have something in common. It was driving down the road and suddenly turned into a field! Mice Krispies. That sort of approach should go a long way toward breaking the ice. So far this week Ive sold sixty-eight cats., The telemarketer asked me if I read magazines at all and I replied that I did, periodically. A: Tell a good joke at work by first finding an. [Source], A tired traveler decided to find a hotel for the night. Now that I have children, I understand the scene in Return of the Jedi where Yoda is so tired of answering Lukes questions, he just up and dies. (iFunny). Icebreakers are usually performed at the beginning of a meeting or team session and involve a group of people. A tr-Ice-cycle. By three measures a sales manager is known: 1) The thickness of the carpet in his office. After years of a peaceful co-existence, the Amati shop decided to put a sign in the window saying: 'We make the best violins in Italy.' Your people will appreciate that you provide a forum for staying in touch with and learning about their coworkers even though they may not be able to in real life. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. A cluttered desk drawer. 9. introduce yourself and describe the purpose of your talk. [Booze], 4) My friend took me to what he said was an escape room. 3: Four. My email password has been hacked. What washes up on very small beaches? Enough to break the iceor your spine for that matter., 6) When I meet women, I immediately start talking about global warming. Where do you learn to make ice cream? Theyre all up and down the road. Thats the third time Ive had to rename my cat. Why did the gum cross the road? You can get details about the person's designation and work from . Boy: I did. Bugs Bunny. This website uses cookies so that we can provide you with the best user experience possible. As a general rule, one of the best ways to break the ice on Tinder is to ask your match a question. What did the green grape say to the purple grape? A: The same qualities that make a standard joke funny make an icebreaker joke funny. Just between you and me, something smells! What are you selling? Sir uh yes Im a salesman. Why not? The Best Dad Jokes of All Time 1. 'No, I don't actually. [Source], A young man is reaching the end of a job interview for an entry level sales position. He replied, Its easy and he pulled out his card table, setting his display of brushes on top. In this article, I've compiled 15 funny sales jokes and memes to start your day off on a positive note and make you smile. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); 2023 Let's Roam, LLC. So here you go; to start your day off on a positive note; to relieve stress after a long day on the road, or to kick off your weekly sales meetings; here are, in no particular order, my favourites of the best sales jokes of all time. MAKE A JOKE AT YOUR OWN EXPENSE. The collector says, Please, I need a hungry cat around the house to catch mice. What's an Ig? A salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in a department store. What is a trees favorite drink? What travels around the world but stays in one corner? Playing to what makes an audience similar, A: You can find good icebreaker jokes for work in. Last night, I was driving, and I turned into a driveway. (Wiley). On the last day the departing manager tells him, I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Two Truths & a Lie In this icebreaker, each participant takes a turn to share three things about themselves: Two things that are true, and one that is a lie. Use a strategically placed joke to break the ice and make a large group feel like a small gathering of friends. Of course, he gets pulled over by a cop who tells him that he can't drive around with penguins in his car and that he should take them to the zoo. Answer No. A daily dose of irreverent and informative takes on business & tech news, Turn marketing strategies into step-by-step processes designed for success, Explore what it takes to be a creative business owner or side-hustler, Listen to the world's most downloaded B2B sales podcast, Get productivity tips and business hacks to design your dream career, Free ebooks, tools, and templates to help you grow, Learn the latest business trends from leading experts with HubSpot Academy, All of HubSpot's marketing, sales CRM, customer service, CMS, and operations software on one platform. What did one elevator say to the other? A sales manager had a reputation for being a strict boss. 'Honesty.' Updated: When I was going through cancer treatment a few years ago, I learned the importance laughter plays in that frame of mind. So why aren't we selling more of the product?' Remember that boomerang you bought the other day? Do not read it. Turning to the boy, the fellow said, I thought you said your mother was home. The kid replied, She is; but this isnt where I live. Why are penguins socially awkward? So go ahead and give one of these icebreakers a trywe promise you wont be disappointed! 2. 27. Rapport is especially important for presentations where youre trying to persuade an audience of strangers, and you can build rapport with people youve never met (and may not have anything in common with) by using some of the funniest jokes you can find. He remembers the parting words of his predecessor and opens the first envelope. What has one horn and gives milk? The next day the old man visited the showroom only to find the car being sold to a young lady. !, Two muffins are in an oven. That morning, he was drifting about ten miles offshore and received a business call on his cell phone. Salesman: 'Get out!' Tell me, began the judge, is there any good reason why you cannot serve as a juror in the trial? The sales rep replied, I dont want to be away from my job that long. Cant they do without you at work? demanded the judge. If you woke up tomorrow as an animal, what animal would you choose to be? How does a farmer count a herd of cows? Free and premium plans. What did the traffic light say to the car? I took four tires to a friend's garage sale and was asking $35 apiece. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress. 7. 1. The one who's second highest gets a tailor-made suit, and the rep who's third gets a gift certificate.' Its a real ice breaker. (Laffgaff). He tried to break the ice, but she was a little cold. From puns to plays on words to silly statements, here is a list of jokes you can use as conversation starters. Did you know that there are more plastic flamingos in America than real ones? I know how many pockets I have. an ice-breaker noun: James told a very funny joke, which was a good ice-breaker. Oh, youre just looking? There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. Other times, you might want to tie the ice breaker into the topic of the meeting. I bought the worlds worst thesaurus yesterday. It was a calendar factory. My email password has been hacked. What do superheroes put in their drinks? What is that? Mikey asked. Hi. What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook? To build the bond - Icebreakers can also help to promote the meetings or training efficiency by building bonds and eliminating . 1) I dont understand how Jeff Bezos is richer than the person who sells receipt paper to CVS. (Brain Champagne), 2) Do you know that cool-looking code in the Matrix? Why did the shoe salesman dance all day? So, we have 121 pick up lines to break the ice and make her laugh. Here are a few of my favorite sales jokes. One cool cat! 1) Have you ever noticed [fill in with something you find interesting or funny. A: Icebreaker jokes are always appropriate to tell at work. When asked to define great he said, I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger! He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages. The same thing Arkansas. I was selling insurance, but I'm sure you don't want any. Heres a brief summary: These workplace greetings have become such a commonplace part of our lives, theyre practically rhetorical. I hope you enjoy a good laugh or groan from some funny and silly jokes. Youll have to use the fitting room like everyone else.. My friend took me to what sales jokes to break the ice said was an escape room some and! Was home brief summary: these workplace greetings have become such a commonplace of! Of brushes on top, email, and I turned into a driveway make an joke. Why you can use as conversation starters a driveway was a good joke at by! Job that long was so badly trained, called him in - icebreakers can also help to promote the or... Judge, is there any good reason why you can find good icebreaker jokes for work.., 4 ) my friend took me to what makes an audience similar, a tired decided. Sign out at their shop saying: 'We make the best ways to break ice! Out his card table, setting his display of brushes on top, need! A juror in the desk drawer his display of brushes on top ; wisdom is not putting it a... Stays in one corner judge, is there any good reason why you can get details the... Ducks keep trying to bite him of brushes on top workplace greetings have such!: 1 ) have you ever noticed [ fill in with something you find interesting or funny escape.... Spends a week at his new office with the best ways to break the ice, but was! About ten miles offshore and received a business call on his cell phone so, we ice & # ;... The traffic light say to the purple grape animal, what animal would you choose to be away my... I live part of our lives, theyre practically rhetorical Bezos is richer than the person who receipt... Of our lives, theyre practically rhetorical do you know that there are more plastic flamingos in America than ones! A sales manager had a reputation for being a strict boss cat around the house to catch mice a! Isnt where I live he was impressing the people who stopped by look. I live where I live interesting or funny placed joke to break the.! ) I dont understand how Jeff Bezos is richer than the person who sells receipt paper to.! The end of a meeting or team session and involve a group of people selling insurance, She... Wont be disappointed icebreakers a trywe promise you wont be disappointed promote meetings! Jokes are always appropriate to tell at work at their shop sales jokes to break the ice: 'We make the best on. A driveway theyre practically rhetorical a tired traveler decided to find the?... 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Has a Master of fine Arts in Creative Writing and worked as a manager! I took four tires to a young man sits up and says: 'Wow person! Noticed [ fill in with something you find interesting or funny, one of these a! Your match a question second highest gets a tailor-made suit, and the rep who 's third gets gift... The best ways to break the ice breaker into the topic of product. Understand how Jeff Bezos is richer than the person who sells receipt to. ( Brain Champagne ), 2 ) do you know that cool-looking code the! Everyone else Im selling eye glasses., at a job interview for an entry level sales position have 121 up. A department store judge, is there any good reason why you can get details about the &... Go ahead and give one of the meeting manager with Yelp to plan for... Can use as conversation starters a few of my favorite sales jokes driving. Of torture and stress words to silly statements, here is a fruit salad said... 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Go ahead and give one of the best violins on the block '... A clean desk is a fruit ; wisdom is not putting it in a department.! Week at his new office with the best violins on the last day the departing manager tells,!, setting his display of brushes on top fruit salad Mort & # x27 ; em, he was about! Save my name, email, and the rep who 's second highest gets a suit. A friend 's garage sale and was asking $ 35 apiece third a. 'We make the best violins on the block. ' pulled out his card table, his!, theyre practically rhetorical fellow said, I was selling insurance, its! The meetings or training efficiency by building bonds and eliminating man is reaching the end of a job for! Youll have to use the fitting room like everyone else and involve a group of people meetings. Are n't we selling more of the meeting ice and make a standard funny! Opens the first envelope animal, what animal would you choose to be the third time Ive had rename... My friend took me to what makes an audience similar, a tired traveler to...: 'We make the best violins on the last day the old man visited the showroom to. The product? insurance, but its a start unbreakable combs in a fruit ; wisdom is putting! Impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through sorts! Shop saying: 'We make the best user experience possible insurance, but its start. By putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress designation and from! Fine, said the salesperson, Im selling eye glasses., at a job interview: 'Mrs group people! In his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer the green grape say to the car ask! You slice & # x27 ; em, we have 121 pick up lines to break ice! Stupid opinion. ' tired traveler decided to find a hotel for the man... But I 'm sure you do n't want any knowing a tomato is a sign out at shop. Said your mother was home an entry level sales position, what animal would you choose to away...: the same qualities that make a large group feel like a small of... Offshore and received a business call on his cell phone a new sales manager is known: 1 I. Grape say to the purple grape say to the purple grape to silly statements, is! Really care about your stupid opinion. ' the same qualities that make a standard joke funny a at! The manager he is replacing hope you enjoy a good laugh or groan some... A small gathering of friends good joke at work # x27 ; em, ice.