If you need help, take my help, I'm genuine when I offer. If youre in a meeting or restaurant thats ice cold, and a relative stranger offers to lend you a jacket, you may just feel like youd rather not put on someone elses clothes. This begs the question of whether people actually do judge you more harshly when you turn down their offer of a favor than when you accept it. In my humble and skeptical opinion, if someone cooks for you, yes, they probably like you, but they also may just want to get laid. Its not that he checks you out every time he sees you. Either way, you dont have to offer to help. A neighbor asks how youre doing and you say OK," and even though youre not, your neighbor would not necessarily be doing you a favor by noting that you dont actually look OK and offering to give you a hug. He might be open to talking about his past girlfriends if you ask though. A person who takes pride in the self can take pride in others. Heres an example of what you might say: Hey, I noticed your listing for a VP of Sales on Twitter. That because guys are not great at direct communication, so they prefer to act out how they feel rather than saying it directly. If you ask a guy to help you, but dont really show your appreciation, he may just avoid helping you or may even ignore you. Its a sign that hes really into you. Many guys tend to ask specific questions to get an idea on how you feel about him. Ask him for some manly help when hes around. He knows guys will be attracted to you, so its not a surprise when they approach you. This may seem like it's a conscious and deliberate choice, but it's not always the case. It is a perfect sign, yes. Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox! Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. They really get tripped up when someone actually agrees to take them up on their only-for-show lipservice offer. It's hard to say, really. It is a perfect sign, yes. During the conversation, she mentioned shes really struggling to keep up on her 1:1 meetings in her rapidly-growing team. So don't be afraid to serve it right back at him. Lucky you! If you need help, take my help, I'm genuine when I offer. This is because guys are socialized to believe that womanwill instantly melt at the first sign of a bulging and defined muscle. Perhaps the best way to do this is to lead the conversation through questions. There are four working "men" at a family table of 8, my dad, my uncle, my sis's father-in-law, and my sis's husband. Serving up the hottest food trends and the inside scoop on restaurants worldwide. Driving True Greatness through relationships. Its cute. Is that something that would be valuable for you?. Its sweet. I've seen a lot of people argue at the resister, but usually that gets akward fast, and wait staff hate it. When guys are trying to impress they will subconsciously be driven to offer a helping hand and anticipate when you will need it. Its easy to be the woman that you are, and yet make your man feel like a real man. He does it because he wants to protect you. Throughout the evolution of the damsel in distress stories in history, the attacker of the woman has many different faces. He is simply trying to assert himself within a group of friends to impress you. No problem! It upsets him that he cant do anything about it because hes not your boyfriend. To answer this question, put yourself in the place of that other person. Face is basically your reputation based on Confucius values (I think), and in order to keep "face", you need to appear reliable, charitable, and kind. Hes definitely a keeper when he makes sure you walk on the inside though. That's how basic and primitive this tendency is. His body language can say a lot about how he feels about you. Author Reza Aslan told an amusing story on "WTF w/ Marc Maron" about how Iranian culture is all about this sort of faux acquiescence that only kinda sorta exists in America. Its sweet that hes thinking of you, and its even sweeter when he knows your favorite coffee. In fact, thats the heart of Positive Alacrity and the foundation of great relationships. Although this behavior can sometimes come across as arrogant and rude, take it as a compliment, he's just trying to catch your attention. Its his way of letting you into his life, and his heart, a little more, and shows that he is making a commitment to you and investing in the relationship. Asking a man too many favors can disgruntle him. I like to play a game when I'm on the bus at a bar, or cafe, or basically any public space where people are talking and socializing. If you were listening empathetically and truly hearing her pain points, heres how you might be able to respond: I think I get where youre coming from but let me make sure I understood correctly: Youre feeling like your inability to consistently have 1:1 meetings with your team is causing you to lose touch with your relationships. He cares about you, and he doesnt want you to catch a cold. Let me explain. It is a perfect sign, yes. Its obvious hes into you. Absolutely. All of this is done by our monkey brains though. Its hard to put your phone away when you have all these social media apps on your phone: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat. 5 Spiritual Practices That Increase Well-Being. He stands close to you because he wants to protect you from people bumping into you, and he can grab you quickly if you were to fall. Balance your advice with positive judgments or observations --that is, by giving them a sense of their own potential. [Read: White Knight syndrome 15 signs and reasons why men want to be one]. But when he isnt with you, dont call him over and ask him to help you out unless you really do need his help. One of the things hell do is put his hand on your lower back to guide you through a crowd. Perhaps the best place to start is Accompany. Maybe youre stuck at work because theres so much to do. Nothing says love likea concussion or a couple broken bones. So if you notice his body language perk up around you, take note, he could be trying tocommunicate something much deeper. When a woman lets a man do what he wants without arguing with him *being submissive*, the man kind of likes it. But if he doesnt budge to help you, hes either a slob or youve been asking him too many favors recently. Have fun! How? While much of the courting game of dating and falling in love depends on mutual attraction, theres another secret force that most men and women dont think about the evaluation of desirability. Although it's very subtle and done outside of conscious awareness, pay attention to the tale-tell sign of attraction. Apparently, he feels less rejected with hypothetical questions. If this sounds selfish, thats because it is. It doesnt matter if he was talking with other people, because hell excuse himself to go to you. Although, maybe I shouldnt be so cynical. Most umbrellas arent built for two people to use at the same time. He says hes fine, but hes probably not. In East Asian culture in general, we rely on the principle of "face". In essence, it means taking the quick, easy, and relatively-thoughtless method of simply blurting out, How can I help you?. But they feel terrible about themselves when their woman doesnt need them at all. A low and deep voice signals high testosterone levels in a man. So, its very thoughtful of him when he tells you to take a break because he brought you something to eat. All rights reserved. Giving back to others is not something that narcissists do for the intrinsic pleasure of being altruistic, or from simple kindness. Not sure how to strike up a conversation with someone you havent spoken to in months? It doesnt have to be coffee. A man likes helping a woman when he feels like hes doing a superior job. Download my Five Freebies eBook here for 5 ready-to-send email templates that allow you to access virtually anyone in your network at practically any time. It's because you look like you need help and maybe you'll be better off with me helping you. Personally, it's how I relate to people, girls can also tease when they like someone. WebIf he sees you carrying something heavy with difficulty and immediately jumps up to help you, hes still happy with the damsel in distress in you. It could be with food, too. So always remember the thin line. but he can't help but tell that story that makes him look like a knight in shining armor. And that starts by never asking, Hey, how can I help you?. Hes into you, girl! Pregnancy and parenting news, given to you in a way nobody else has. Throughout history, the idea of a damsel in distress is a narrative that says that a man *or men* should rescue a woman who is in trouble or perhaps even kidnapped. Its like they dont exist to him. 11 2 Quora User Knowing how to put your gratitude into words can be difficult, but it's worth the effort. Its obvious hes into you. Sometimes, not even your friends can tell what you did. He knows what you need, and he brings it over without you asking for it. And just like that, in the real world, when a man sees a woman who needs help, he instinctively feels the urge to help her not for her sake, but for his own, as in that brief moment, he feels like a hero! He may love a damsel in distress, but he definitely doesnt need an overdose of machismo. Balance your advice with positive judgments or observations --that is, by giving them a sense of their own potential. This is somewhat of a stereotype these days, but in history, this was true almost all of the time. He cant help but really look at you when hes talking to you and admire everything about you like your looks and your personality. 1 0 Reply Anonymous (25-29) +1 y That could mean one of two things: 1) he's into you, or 2) he's just being friendly 0 Reply helpman Follow When guys are trying to impress they will subconsciously be driven to offer a helping hand and anticipate when you will need it. Heres a few questions you could ask to start to uncover someones professional challenges: Personal interests/passions are those things that someone is genuinely excited to talk about, and often something they have a wealth of knowledge around. Giving back to others is not something that narcissists do for the intrinsic pleasure of being altruistic, or from simple kindness. It could be because hes nervous. WebIf he is offering you larger support, such as helping you process emotional baggage or helping you through a difficult time, he is showing that he is ready to go deeper and is very interested in you. But it bothers him when you give another guy your undivided attention. He fears he might make a fool of himself like trip on his way over to you. He doesnt want you to think hes a creep when you constantly catch him looking at you, so he looks away quickly. Another scenario is when one of his close friends asks you, If he asked you out, would you date him? When his close friends get involved, it means that theres definitely something going on. Only if he's trying to impress. He doesnt turn around to see where his friends are or whos standing next to him. If they offer and you reject it and they offer again, let them. When it comes to guys, it seems like they subconsciously know this, and will drop their voices down an octave or two when they are on an attractive girl. If he does most of these things, then you have your answer. How badly do you want to go out with this person? He asks you. When you love yourself, love and support your partner, It might be normal with friends but usually the person who is "older" or maybe in a position to take the bill (invited the guest out, etc. He did something for you, so he may be into you, but you're friends, so he may actually be nice. Her latest book is The Search for Fulfillment. This behavior isn't only reserved for guys. The classic movie Pretty Woman is a prime example. The part that happens more unconsciously is trying to dress and present yourself in a way that you think he will like. Even if he doesnt watch Stranger Things, hell want you to tell him all about it, and hell even ask you questions to show his interest. Sometimes, hell literally ask you, Can I ask you a hypothetical question? and when you say sure, he asks, What would you say if I asked you to be my date for my friends wedding? He wants to know the answer before he formally asks you the question in case you were to say no. It could be his lack of confidence. Or multiple people from one table would come up at different times and slyly tell you they would be paying, or give a credit card in advance. And if he was with a dominant woman, she would not allow him to do that. Hes probably nervous, and maybe hes also trying to figure out if you like him back. [Read: Why men like the chase and how to use this in your favor as a woman]. When you tell him you want to take kickboxing class, he smiles and teases you with, You? He shares his future plans with you. Therefore, the only worry you should have is that you seem ungrateful for the gesture. Why Are So Many Young Men Single And Sexless? Telling someone - with words - howyou really feel about them is scary for everyone, but especially scary for dudes because a lot of films, tv and stories they read growing up featured those stoic and silent of gentleman-types that didn't share their inner thoughts, even with the women they like. He also doesnt want you to think hes hung up on his ex or that hes a player. Ever found yourself in a situation like this? The fact that hes introducing you to his friends or family is a great sign that a man is serious about you. Its obvious hes into you. The problem is, most people go about offering help in the worst way possible and, as a result, end up not helping as effectively as they could (if at all). It could be a good thing as long as he doesnt push you. It could happen with words, too. Let me give you a few examples of strong Second Dart questions: Youll know you found something truly meaningful to them when their eyes light up, their smile reaches their eyes (rather than staying confined to their mouth), their energy level increases, and their body language appears more open. Unfortunately, the hosts were really good at denying the gift, so after the 10th try the girl gives up. They really get tripped up when someone actually agrees to take them up on their only-for-show lipservice offer. What if you offered that sweater or jacket to a chilly companion and she said, No, Im OK. How much thought would you give to that interaction? I'm pretty sure I've seen some chimpanzees do the same thing at the zoo. If they offer and you reject it and they don't offer again, they didn't genuinely want to do it. Does your crush teaching you how to play guitar, change your oil, or change your cars lights automatically mean he is into you? Dont decline every kind offer out of politeness. Remember that men love an independent woman. Is he interested? Hes thinking about what to say to you like if he should ask you questions about your hobbies or talk about things that might be interesting to you. Because hes a gentleman, he makes sure the umbrella covers you more than it does him. He wants to be honest with you, and he doesnt want you to think hes still hurt from the breakups. When you like someone it's natural to laugh at their jokes, even ifthey are not that funny at all. You might not notice it, but when you do, you might think hes mocking you. Just crack a couple silly jokes or tease them a little, if they react by laughing in a way that is grossly disproportionate to the funniness of the joke, chances are, he's into you. So, when a guy shares his future plans with you, it means you're someone special to him. It just makes him happy that youre with him because he obviously likes you. Brutally paraphrased: Whenever someone offers to pay the check, I always grab my wallet because inside is a note that says "Say thanks.". When you take a sip of your drink, he takes a sip of his drink. Thus, thats another reason men like a damsel in distress. This is very important! Does your crush teaching you how to play guitar, change your oil, or change your cars lights automatically mean he is into you? I learned to just quickly drop it and run. Men often have the instinct to help those people that they care about deeply. 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Hes the best and sexiest nurse ever. Or maybe someone offered to help you, but you didnt know how to accept it or politely decline? WebWell it either means he's a nice guy and actually wants to help you or he just wants to hookup with you React Reply What Guys Said 3 KyleSmith Follow Xper 5 Age: 25 +1 y Its an excuse to have a long face to face interation without being straight up. WebSo What Does It Mean if a Guy Offers to Teach You Something? If I offer to help you, it's not because I want the opportunity to experience the joy for helping you. They really get tripped up when someone actually agrees to take them up on their only-for-show lipservice offer. WebOption 1: He is a genuinely nice and mature guy. In Norwegian culture you are happy when someone refuse because you didnt really want to anyways. Or maybe someone offered to help you, but you didnt know how to accept it or politely decline? Listening empathetically means feeling what theyre feeling; putting yourself in their shoes and asking, In this situation, how would I feel? Knowing how to put your gratitude into words can be difficult, but it's worth the effort. And nothing feels better than being on the receiving end of that energy. He might not even notice what he's doing. So many people around the world have grown up with these movies, and it instills an ideal in both girls and boys when they are young. Heres a few examples of things you could offer: A note on that final piece of value: Dont offer unsolicited advice. It's because you look like you need help and maybe you'll be better off with me helping you. The first question, no matter how meaningful or genuine, often results in surface-level answers. When he still hasnt made a move on you, you think he was just being nice. React 1 Reply See 1 replies Zerrok Follow He Wants Something in Return Some men view offering help and support as transactional. It shows that he puts your needs first. Although, maybe I shouldnt be so cynical. WebIf he sees you carrying something heavy with difficulty and immediately jumps up to help you, hes still happy with the damsel in distress in you. 1 0 Reply Anonymous (25-29) +1 y That could mean one of two things: 1) he's into you, or 2) he's just being friendly 0 Reply helpman Follow For example, they have been described as monsters, mad scientists, Nazis, aliens, robots, or any other vicious man or group. Imagine youre wrapping up a meeting with Erin Roberts, founder and CEO at Moogle. There are so many reasons to be grateful, and so many people to thank for their help. I put my headphones in and scan the room and try to decrypt people's body language when they are talking to each other, anddo my best to guess the nature of their relationship. Guys know how much we love to talk and complain when we feel like theyre not listening to us, so. In Japanese culture, it is normal to refuse a few times (some say 3 times) to make sure they really want to pay or is a friendly gesture. Is that right? It might either make you feel uncomfortable or appreciative. He hopes itll make you feel better and also help you focus. And hell be more than happy to help you out again. Will be attracted to you, but you didnt know how to put your gratitude into words can be,! You will need it if this sounds selfish, thats another reason men like a in! Was with a dominant woman, she would not allow him to do it of this is because are. The only worry you should have is that you seem ungrateful for the intrinsic of... Formally asks you, and he doesnt turn around to see where his are... He wants to know the answer before he formally asks you the question when a guy offers to help you with something case you to... See where his friends are or whos standing next to him definitely him... 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